My lovely wife came into my office the other day wearing a t-shirt, shorts, and some stylish, strappy, gold high-heeled sandals. "What do you think?" she asked.
"I think you're going to have a tough time playing tennis in those," I said, pointing to the shoes.
"Idiot. They're for your book launch party."
My book launch party? DIAMONDS FOR THE DEAD isn't scheduled for release until April 2010. That's about nine months from now (or 251 days or 6024 hours, but who's counting?). Surely I don't need to be shopping for shoes yet, do I?
"Do I really need a launch party?" I asked my wife.
"Don't be silly. Of course you do," she said for the fiftieth time.
Actually, it's good someone's thinking about my book launch party. Every time it crosses my mind, I usher it out gently, like the little kid from down the street who keeps showing up in my living room with muddy feet. I mean, isn't one of the good things about being a writer not having to talk to people? (If my editor is reading this, I'm just joking. Sort of.)
A while back, my wife volunteered to organize the party; I didn't argue (not that it would have done any good). Fact is, I'm glad to cede control--I barely know the difference between a canapé and a can of peas, and thinking about hosting a party makes me break out in a rash.
Right now, she's working up a list of possible venues (if I get an idea, I let her know and she patronizes me by jotting it down, which is okay--I've been patronized before.)
Here's what we've come up with so far:
- A bar/restaurant
- A jewelry store (We'll emphasize the "diamonds" part, not the "dead" part.)
- An art gallery (My idea--she makes a face every time I mention it.)
- A local community center
- Our house (This got nixed pretty quickly, but you never know. If we start cleaning tomorrow, we might be ready in time.)
- Banquet room at a hotel
- A local bookstore
Anybody have any other creative ideas? If you do, please leave them in the comments and don't worry, I'll be sure to pass them along to my wife.
After all, I'm not a complete idiot.