I'm pleased to say that DIAMONDS FOR THE DEAD has not received a single negative review. Of course, it hasn't even been released yet--still eight months to go.
So why am I even thinking about reviews? Well, many of my Midnight Ink fellow-authors have gotten great reviews lately, and I'm a little worried I won't be able to keep up.*
In addition, the brouhaha in cyberspace has attracted my attention. In case you're not "fully connected" and haven't heard about these incidents, here's the short version: Several authors** have "sounded off" (on Twitter and in blogs) about some negative reviews in questionable ways.
I like to think I'm a positive and polite guy. Therefore, I am making the following resolutions, well before my first review:
- I shall not be nasty to any reviewers, no matter how ill-informed, idiotic, or full of crap they might be.
- I shall not make any public derogatory comments about any reviewers, or their mothers.
- I shall not threaten any reviewers with bodily harm, Internet flaming, or voodoo curse.
- I shall not tell any reviewers to stuff any object, large or otherwise, into any orifice where the sun don't shine.
- And lastly: I shall thank any reviewers who take the time and energy to read and comment on my book. After all, there are lots of books out there and I'll be grateful if they choose mine.
* I also need something to distract me from my work-in-progress and I'm sick of playing Chess Titans.
**According to a Salon blog, three recent rageful authors are:
Alice Hoffman, Ayelet Waldman, and Alain De Botton. Hmm. Does it mean anything that all their first initials are A?